sibling communication

I have 2 younger brothers. Both called me today. (If you don't care about my brothers or get irritated by poor punctuation you should probably skip reading this post.)

Caleb called from Camp Pendleton. He just had time to kill and wanted someone to talk to. He told me an amusing story about how he got lucky and his bunk is right next to a wall and big pile of extra blankets. Every night he pulls the top blanket off the pile and just sleeps on his made bed. Then, in the morning, when everyone is scrambling to make their beds Caleb just has to fold up the blanket, return it to the pile, and smooth out the wrinkles on his already regulation made bed. Pretty smart.
He also told me about the fortunate placement of an office wheelie chair, someone who wants to buy a Lexus, and how much money he still owes on his truck that leaks oil. I love to hear Caleb's stories.

Benji called from a Walmart. He was going shopping for the ingredients to make pizza. For a date. I directed him towards the spaghetti sauce I would use. Then, on the way to get crust I told him to get lots of mozzarella cheese. This is the first time I thought to ask how many people were going to be eating this pizza. The answer: 10. Hold the phone. I told him to take everything back right away and order pizza. Little Caesar's would be so much cheaper. And easier. "No," he said, "the date is to make pizza and play games." So we started to do the math.
Me: Do you know how many pizzas it will take to feed 10 people? Do you know how long it will take to cook that many pizzas?
Benji: We can use a neighbor's oven, too. I can cook 2 at once. Can't I?
Me: Do you have 2 cookie sheets?
Benji: I can borrow one.
Seriously. I can see exactly how this date would start. Benji picks up the girl and says, "Crap! I have to go to the apartment next door and borrow a cookie sheet." So he knocks on the door and the sheet that is provided has burnt chocolate chip cookie crumbs stuck all over it from when the boys attempted to make treats to impress an apartment full of girls last Sunday.
Next, Benji would realize that the cookie sheet his apartment owns is dirty. "Brian! Did you make the Totino's pizza last night?" No reply. "Jeff?!" No reply. So now Benji has to clear out the sink of dirty dishes just to wash the dirty cookie sheets. Meanwhile, the oven hasn't been preheated, everyone is starving, and Benji is getting more and more stressed out. I'm stressed out and I live 4 states away!
Thankfully he finally said, "Maybe I'll just order Brick Oven." Major disaster averted. I love the predicaments Benji gets himself into. Good thing he called me:)